We just did what Beyonce told us to do.

We liked it. And then we put a ring on it.

OK, I’m telling you up front, this is a rant. Later on, when your ears are burning and outrage is pouring out from every orifice of your body, don’t say I didn’t warn you. In fact if you're single, maybe just stop reading right here and try filing your nails, it might be a better use of your time. And then you can teach me how to do it, yes?

Anyway. Today being April fool’s day, I wasn’t surprised to come across one of those supposedly funny ecards saying, “All those who are happily unmarried, today is not your day. But to everyone else, we wish a very happy ALL FOOL’S DAY.”

Ha ha, ok. I exhaled through my nose a bit more forcefully than usual. Next came this little nugget from Happily Unmarried – “Establishment is boring, it is regular, predictable, safe, comforting and 9 am to 5 pm. Don't endorse it. Be the black sheep, the square peg in the round hole. Change jobs, experiment, travel, get out of your comfort zone, push others, protest against wrong policies, disagree, be vocal, fall in love, occasionally dress unlike yourself, like yourself, don't like everything on FB, stay single as long as you want to. Be outdoors, question authority. Believe that you are the future and no one can stop you.”

Now, I really like Happily Unmarried. They are witty and creative. And while I love the thought, it irks me that this is meant for the “happily unmarried”. Why, in the name of Dr. Phil’s shiny bald head, do happily married people get ostracized and left out from all this distribution of wisdom? When a single person can upload constant #updates of their whereabouts, and 150 pictures of their trip to Goa, why can’t a married couple post 300 pictures of their corny honeymoon, without the singletons rolling their eyes at them? Why this discrimination on the basis of marital status? I feel like just to live up to these expectations, I should buy a SUV and start hosting kitty parties at home. And god forbid that I flaunt my happiness in the face of my single friends. The implication is that now that one is married, one’s life is secure and bland. My wedding was eight months ago and I have probably spent less than 30 of those days with my husband. Whoever says married life is easy and predictable – live my life for a month, why don’t you, and then we’ll talk. Here's a reality check - NOBODY'S life is easy or fair. Apparently once you are married, you can no longer aim to be different, or fall in love, or experiment. What? Oh right, now that I am wed my focus must be to produce offspring and fatten up my spouse with suji ka halwa dripping with ghee. Why would I want to learn something new?

So this is my shout-out to all my friends who are married – Be proud that you are with the person you love. Make new friends, take dance lessons and educate yourself on current affairs. Take a vacation with your partner to some place you would never go alone, and pick up a hobby you can learn by yourself, sans spouse. Be married as long as you want to be.

And to all my friends who are unmarried and proud of it – Good for you! I am glad that you are enjoying your life and reminding everyone else that you are doing so. But please, please invite me to your wedding – I absolutely love weddings. 

Silent shores

The sea at night is a living, breathing giant. The moonlight reflects on the water as it rolls on and on, unaware of the wonders it hides and the awe it inspires in me this moonlit night. The wind that tugs on my hair is its voice, and the waves lapping at my feet entice me to walk right in, and don't be afraid. As I finally turn around to leave, it's almost hypnotic the way I have to turn around and say goodbye, again and again. And as we drive away, I can't help but think the sea must have been glad to have some company to share its thoughts with, this lonely, moonlit night. 

Advice and stuff

I decided to make a list of useful advice I've gotten from my family and friends. This is all I have till now -

1. From my parents - Whatever you decide to do in life, you should be able to buy your own bread, and your own high heels.

2. From my dog - Never eat a bowl full of chocolates at once. It gets bad. 

3. From my best friend -  "Well, you can flirt with him now and think about the "later" part later." (Four months ago, I married him.) 

4. Last but not the least, "If you're short of time, just apply lotion and run a razor over your legs."

I spy
with my little eye
Hypocrites.

Your twenties is the decade for self discovery, making friends, discovering truths and building relationships that will last forever.
Lies.
You know what happens in the 20s? You sidetrack friends continuously, for that "better half". You discover a few truths and your head swells till you can't fit it through the door of most people's hearts. Everyone around you is inadequate and mediocre. You want to do everything, indeed you can do everything, but how? Its not possible, because the world just isn't good enough for you!

Is this what is called a quarter life crisis, I wonder? Or maybe its just too much stress and lack of sleep. In any case, I'm getting tired of this shit.

Disillusionment is a strong word. Everyone tends to go through it once; you put someone on a pedestal, willingly or not - a friend, a lover or a parent. Then you watch in wonder as the pedestal breaks under the weight of your expectations. This can lead to two things though. The person could come crashing down and leave you wondering why you put them there in the first place, or you find that they now stand on solid ground and you can see the real beauty of their flaws and the true colour of their eyes.